Cold
by bloodyprussian
Summary: When Gilbert is forced to leave his brother and live with Russia, someone decides to be the company he needs. (COMPLETED - ONE SHOT)


Prussia was sure that dying could've been better than being in that place. He wouldn't have his brother worrying about him and he wouldn't be experimenting torture in its pure form.

Gilbert sighed, looking at the brand new bruises on his arms. He knew they would soon fade away, since humans made them, but it was his mental health he was worried about. He would definitely never forget all of that pain. That is, if it ever stopped, because he wasn't sure if he was going to be trapped forever with Ivan.

He felt cold, colder than he'd ever felt. Russia was nothing like Germany. Germany's cold weather was wonderful and it brought nothing but happy memories to him. The cold Russian weather only made his body and mind hurt.

The door of his (really small) bedroom opened, and he found Lithuania holding something in his hand. "I'm sorry to bother, Prussia, but it seems like you've got mail," the shorter man replied, and Gilbert noticed how he tried his best to ignore the horrible conditions the albino was in.

" _Danke schön_ , Tolys," he mumbled and grabbed the card. The other nation left and closed the door behind him.

It was the first time in months that Prussia had received a letter. Somehow, Ivan let them get mail but never from other countries, so it made the guy with red eyes feel confused. He opened the envelope cautiously and began to read. It was in English.

 _Dear Gilbert,_

 _I know, you're wondering who I am. And I don't think you'll ever guess, but that's okay with me._

 _I'm writing because I know you might be feeling awful, and I'm begging you to not lose hope. Keep fighting, keep breathing, I promise it will be over soon._

 _I don't think Russia knows who I am, and he certainly doesn't know where this letter is coming from, but he knows it's not from Germany._

 _I'm far away from you, Gilbert, but I'm willing to be the company you need even being miles away._

 _I know you can't write back, so I'll answer some of the questions you might have._

 _Ludwig misses you, and is just as hopeful as I am that this will be over soon and you two will be together again. Elizabetha won't admit it, but she truly misses your presence, and I even heard Roderich mumbling to himself once about he wished you were bothering him and not being where you are. Antonio and Francis miss you too, they're your best friends after all. They all want to see you again and know that bad things don't last forever._

 _You should remember that, Prussia._

 _You'll be home soon,_

 _MW._

Gilbert felt his heart ache. He smiled to himself as tears streamed down his face. He didn't know who that person was, but if all of that suffering was going to be over, he'd be sure to thank the man or woman who wrote the letter.

He said thank you to one un particular, while staring at the ceiling of the room, and then fell asleep holding the paper close to his chest.

-0-

The next letter came four days later, and Prussia felt all of his gone strength being back when he took the letter and pushed Lithuania out of his room.

He closed the door and then sat on his (really uncomfortable) bed, opening the envelope and reading the letter with attention.

 _Dear Gilbert,_

 _I hope you're not feeling too cold there, winter in Russia tends to be tough. Please remember to take care of yourself as much as you can!_

 _I daily wonder how you're doing, but I know that "okay" is not the answer, so it really makes me feel sad. You don't deserve this, none of the others nations with you deserve it._

 _The other day I went to Germany with my brother, and found your little yellow bird chirping on a tree. I recognised him because he had your iron cross necklace. Let me tell you, he's fine. I've been taking care of him and I'll give it back when you return to your home._

 _Also, I gave the necklace to your brother. He almost broke down when I did. He really misses you, and the others too._

 _Please, stay strong. You'll make it out of this one, you're the awesome Prussia after all._

 _I'll write to you later,_

 _MW._

The albino smiled to himself. He had forgotten for some minutes about the awful cuts he had received that morning, from Ivan himself. He hoped those would fade just like the ones he got from humans.

His arms hurt, and he was now crying because of the pain he felt and how miserable he was. He missed his brother, his house, his pet, his friends, everything.

He put the letter under his pillow, like he had done with the first one, and cried himself to sleep.

-0-

The third letter came only a week later. Gilbert didn't even complain about how much his legs hurt when he stood up and walked towards Ukraine to grab it. The female nation had smiled sadly at him before leaving, since she noticed how a mixture of burns and cuts were visible in the man's legs.

 _Dear Gilbert,_

 _I'm sorry it took me so long to send you this, but I've been having some bad days myself. Of course, none of them compare to yours..._

 _I hope you're not too bad in there, you really don't deserve it._

 _We've never talked much (at least not since I stopped being a kid), to be honest, but when we did, you were really nice to me. I'd like to say this is my way of saying "thanks", and I hope these letters help you somehow._

 _I beg you to not lose your smile. Please, never stop smiling, your face wouldn't be yours if that bright and cheerful smile wasn't there. I hope I can see it again, and I'm pretty sure I will._

 _Today I remember that one time, in a world meeting, when you and France changed England's tea for coffee. The look on his face was priceless. And the way he started chasing America and blamed him for it? I don't think I've ever seen Alfred run that much. Besides, Arthur's insults were really funny._

 _Did you notice how his eyebrows seem to become bigger when he's angry? It's hilarious._

 _Anyways, I hope I made you smile at least a tiny bit. And I hope that your day doesn't end as bad as it had stared._

 _I sent a picture of Gilbird with this letter, I hope it's still there, I know how they tend to check every single letter there._

 _Smile, Prussia. You deserve it._

 _I send you a warm hug that you probably need,_

 _MW._

Gilbert felt the need to cry once again, when he saw the picture of his beloved pet.

He had laughed at the memory of Arthur chasing after Alfred, and was so glad that this MW was writing these letters to him. At that moment, it was all he needed to remain sane and not to lose hope.

His heart fluttered and he felt a smile tug his lips at the last part. Because the person who was writing was right, he truly needed a hug.

-0-

Months had passed since the first letter, and MW never failed to send one every four days.

Gilbert was having a really bad day, since some of the guards blamed him for one window being broken. He had wanted to argue with Ivan and tell him that he didn't do it, but he didn't have that much strength and so he let himself be punished by the other nation.

If he'd been a human, all of the blood he had lost would've been his cause of death. He'd never had so many cuts in his body until that day. Every single part of him hurt like hell. He even wondered if hell was worse than where he was. Probably not.

Seeing the letter on his bed that night was the best thing to him.

 _Dear Gilbert,_

 _We've managed to gain some information of how Russia is treating you, and I'm writing with tears in my eyes (I'm sorry if I wet the paper). I just can't believe it..._

 _I don't know what to say, honestly. If you knew how much I want to help you and make all of the pain go away, but I can't._

 _I'm hoping that all of this will end up soon, believe me._

 _I can't find the words to write how I feel right now. Everything seems so... dark and cold. I want nothing for you and for the others there to be free and be with your loved ones._

 _I won't revel who I am, but once you go back home, you can ask your brother. If he remembers me, he'll tell you, and if he doesn't... well, I think you'll find out._

 _I'm sorry, I can't keep writing right now. My emotions are all over the place, and I guess I just worry more about you than I do for the others because I might feel something towards you. Something that I know you'll never feel towards me._

 _I hope you can excuse me, because for once, everything is too much for me._

 _Take care of yourself, Gil. Stay alive, please just, stay alive and fight with all of the strength you have left. Do it for Ludwig, for Elizabetha, for Roderich, for Antonio, for Francis, for Feliciano, for yourself._

 _I need to see those beautiful red eyes shine with happiness once again, and your damn charming smile that makes everyone stare at you. I need you hear your strange but contagious laugh again and also hear you ramble about how awesome you are because, yes, you are awesome. You're one of the strongest nations I've ever known, if not the most, and you can handle this, I know you can. You know you can._

 _Even though I practically admitted having a crush on you and am too embarrassed, I promise I won't stop writing. I won't leave you alone, Gil._

 _With lots of love,_

 _MW._

Gilbert laughed. He didn't know why but he still laughed. Maybe he had finally losen his mind. Or maybe it was the strange and weird emotions he had never felt.

Was it possible to fall for someone who you don't even know, but at the same time you do? He wasn't sure.

But one thing that he was sure of, was that he needed to know the nation who had been his only companion during his long and awful suffering. He needed to know the person that just by writing kind words could make his day ten time better. He needed to get out of there.

-0-

It was all over. The Wall fell.

Gilbert let himself cry as he hugged his brother, who seemed horrified by the albino's appearance. This, of course, made Ludwig cry as well. Prussia had never seen him like that, and he hoped that it was the first and last time he did.

He was home, and Gilbert couldn't have been happier about it. After all that horrible time he'd spent trapped like some lab rat, he was finally able to return with his loved ones.

Germany took his brother home before Prussia passed out in his arms, who, before doing so, told him to get all of the letters and take them home with him. The blue eyed nation felt anger when seeing what Ivan had done to the white haired man.

He put the older nation in his bed and let him rest.

But it didn't last long, since Prussia woke up in the middle of the night, crying and screaming due to horrible nightmares. The albino apologised for waking his little brother up, but the blond only gave him a tight hug and Gilbert broke down two seconds after that.

It took the Prussian a month to get fully recovered, fiscally, since he knew that he was permanently psychologically damaged, and no amount of pills or therapy could change that. But he still managed it pretty well. Ludwig even suggested that he should attend a meeting, but the albino wasn't too keen on the idea. Not yet at least.

But he did ask his brother about the person who kept him company during those awful days back in Russia's, and sadly the blond couldn't remember. Gilbert almost broke the glass he was holding when getting that answer.

"How can you not remember? That nation gave you something that is very important for me, and for you! How is it that you can't remember a nation's name!"

"I'm sorry, okay? Stop screaming at me! It happened a long time ago, I can't even remember how I got your necklace back!"

Prussia let himself fall on the couch and ruffled his hair in frustration.

How could someone forget a nation?

His eyes widened at the thought.

 _"Ah, nobody ever notices me. I'm happy you do."_

"MW...," he mumbled to himself before grabbing his phone. His brother eyed him suspiciously.

"Gilbert, what are you doing?"

"I'm finding the person who kept me sane while I was in my darkest hours," he replied, and soon a loud and cheerful voice greeted him on the other side of the line. "Hey, it's me... Yes, I know, I'll tell you when I see you... No, I just need to know something...What's your brother's human name?"

-0-

It wasn't that cold in Ontario, Gilbert had to admit that. He played with the sleeve of his sweater after knocking on the door in front of him.

When it opened, wide and beautiful violet-blue eyes were looking at him. The albino smiled at Canada's reaction. "Matthew Williams... It's been a long time, don't you think?" Gilbert said and noticed the other nation's cheeks become redder.

"Gilbert, what brings you here?" Canada asked, after letting him in and closing the door behind him. Prussia's soft stare was something Matthew would always love about him.

The albino took a bunch of letters out of his pockets, and the surprised look on the curly haired boy told him that he had gone to the right place. "You know, I did ask Ludwig, but he couldn't remember who would recover something that holds so much value to him and to me. I couldn't believe it, how could he forget someone? Specially a nation who had done such an amazing thing? And then it came to me, the last time we talked right after the Great War. Then, I put two and two together and asked America to remind me your human name," he explained, getting closer and closer to the Canadian, who gave him a small smile.

"I told you you'd get it," Matthew said, his voice being so soothing and calming that Gilbert couldn't help but feel his heart melt.

"Well, I'm the Awesome Prussia after all," the red eyed nation replied and walked closer to him. "You, Canada, were the light I needed in all that darkness. You were the constant reminded I needed to keep going and not give up. I truly can't find words to thank you, so I'll just do what I think is right."

"What do you m-"

The violet eyed nation was suddenly interrupted by a pair of lips over his. His eyes widened at the sudden action but he then closed his eyes, melting into the kiss and bringing Prussia closer to him.

Gilbert had never felt so good, and after all of the bad things that had happened to him, he though he'd start crying out of happiness. But he managed to not lose his cool.

When the kiss was over, Matthew's cheeks were completely red and Gilbert's hair was a mess. "Thank you, Mattie," the now personification of East Germany said in a whisper, and Canada offered him a warm and sweet smile.

"There's no need to thank me, Gil," he answered and then looked through the window. It was getting dark.

The albino noticed that too, and then gave him a smile. "Is it much of a trouble if I stay?"

"Not at all."

Gilbert decided that Matthew was the best nation he'd ever met. And he was also finding himself falling for the blond.

Nothing else mattered to him in that moment, all he needed were more kisses and hugs. Well, and maybe pancakes.


End file.
